Had a moment of self awareness recently. Did I really leave that toxic mindset in the past? If I did, how would I know? How would I be sure? How would I verify I had actually changed?
For transparency I'll give a tiny bit of context. There was a person in my past that would resurface from time to time when they were bored or wanted to use me. And I would unfortunately be duped, be gullible enough to believe them that "they had changed!" (hint: they hadn't, they just got better at manipulating me).
A number of months ago I finally became free of them! Hallelujah!
So now I am doing some gut checking, some self analysis.
Am I really free of them?
Well, what does freedom feel like? Does it feel the same as before? Nope, change has to feel like something has changed!
So what does leaving your toxic past in the past feel like? Well it does indeed feel like you're leaving some baggage on the ground and walking away. Or that you lost 100 lbs. Or that you stopped carrying around these old versions of you, and now your world and your life feel lighter, like you're walking on clouds!
So the two questions I had to ask myself:
Did you feel the weight lifted when the change happened?
Thankfully I can say YES. There was a tangible, very real feeling of a giant weight fell away from me, my body, my heart, and my soul.
Do you still feel lighter today?
And thankfully I can say YES to this one too! I still feel changed, I still feel as though that weight is gone from my life!
So now the questions I have for you...
Did you feel that weight lifted when you got free of that _________?
Do you still feel that weight is gone? Or has it returned...?